Experts have learned a lot about COVID-19 since stay-at-home orders first hit the United States last spring. During that time, health officials in New York City, Washington DC, and elsewhere released guidelines on how to have safe sex during the pandemic. Although widespread vaccination is under way, these new guidelines regarding safe sex are unlikely to go away anytime soon, since no one actually knows when the pandemic will officially come to an end. As experts continue to learn more about the novel coronavirus and its variants, the advice they give may change. Here’s what experts want you to know about safe sex and the pandemic right now. RELATED: 8 Biggest COVID Vaccine Myths Not only is sex a great workout, safe and consensual sex can help us feel relaxed, ease anxiety and tension in the body, act as a natural sleep aid, and cause the brain to release hormones, including endorphins (the body’s natural uppers) and oxytocin (the so-called love hormone), says Shannon Chavez, PsyD, a sex therapist based in Beverly Hills, California. “That chemical is what makes us desire cuddling even after sex,” explains Dr. Chavez, adding that this flood of hormones can also create a bond that triggers feelings of safety. “Any physical connection, especially a 20-second hug or a lingering kiss that lasts around 10 seconds can also release those same feel-good chemicals,” says Chavez. During these stressful and uncertain times, we could all benefit from mood-boosting experiences, she notes. “We have to acknowledge that skin hunger is real,” says Sara C. Flowers, DrPH, vice president of education at Planned Parenthood. “Our needs haven’t changed during the pandemic, just the way we meet those needs.” RELATED: 7 Healthy Reasons You Should Have Sex
How to Practice Safe Sex During the Pandemic
According to Dr. Flowers, an important part of having sex during the pandemic is making sure you and your partners are on the same page, just as you would while forming a COVID pod. “Making sure people are adhering to the same practices is important,” says Flowers. “There are questions we can ask folks around the way they have been distancing and making sure you have a shared value system around what safe distancing looks like.” Scientists are still working to understand a lot about how the original strains of the coronavirus spread, but new variants of SARS-CoV-2, the virus that causes COVID-19, are now spreading across the world, including in the United States. This complicates things a bit. According to Tara Smith, PhD, a professor of epidemiology at Kent State University in Ohio, scientists are still working to understand exactly how the new variants behave. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the new variants appear to spread faster and easier than the original strains. “We know at least the U.K. B.1.1.7 variant, which is present in the United States, does seem to be more infectious, but we don’t know exactly how much so,” says Dr. Smith, noting that because scientists don’t yet understand new variants such as B.1.1.7, it’s unclear if current safety measures are enough. “Does close contact now mean within six feet of someone for five minutes instead of 15? We just don’t know,” says Smith, who advises people to take even more caution to prevent themselves from getting or spreading the coronavirus. This means understanding the ways in which it can be spread. RELATED: Dating During the Coronavirus
Can COVID-19 Be Transmitted Through Body Fluids During Sex?
The main risk factor is that COVID-19 is highly contagious through the saliva and mucus of an infected person, and sex traditionally requires people to be within six feet of each other. Being in the same room as an infected person significantly increases the likelihood that the virus will jump from one person to another, even without touching each other, especially if one person is carrying a mutated form of the virus. In addition, a study published in May 2020 in the journal Gastroenterology determined that the virus is detectable in fecal matter, in some cases even when respiratory tests were negative, and can be transmitted to an uninfected person through the mouth. A more recent small retrospective study, published in January 2021 in the Journal of Medical Virology, found that in people who had severe cases of COVID-19, viral RNA could be detected in the fecal matter of some up to 46 days after they were exposed to the virus. Depending on your beneath-the-sheets habits, this could be an issue. A study published July 2020 in the journal Clinical Infectious Diseases found that the coronavirus does not appear to be present in vaginal fluid and several studies have found no presence of the virus in semen of recovered people. However, a study published May 2020 in JAMA Network Open found that SARS-CoV-2 can be present in the semen of patients with COVID-19 and while recovering.
Who’s a Safe Sex Partner During the Pandemic?
“As with sexually transmitted infections, sex with a new partner always brings with it some amount of risk. The best we can do in such circumstances is to assess this risk honestly and make an informed decision,” says Kumi Smith, PhD, an assistant professor of epidemiology and community health at the University of Minnesota School of Public Health in Minneapolis. “Practically speaking, though, a partner with whom you live or with whom you have been coisolating is probably the safest person to have sex with for the time being,” says Dr. Kumi Smith, as long as these people do not have symptoms of COVID-19. As for people who do not work from home, Kumi Smith says that it’s difficult to provide blanket guidelines, since different people who work outside the home are exposed to different levels of risk. If you or your partner is worried that they may have been exposed to COVID-19, it’s a good idea to keep your distance as much as possible for the following two weeks until you can be sure they do not develop symptoms. “Asking cohabitating couples to abstain from sex for months on end does not strike me as a sustainable disease control method,” says Kumi Smith. Generally, the same basic household rules apply: Thoroughly wash hands during work as well as upon returning home, frequently disinfect surfaces and objects like your phone and keys, closely monitor symptoms, and create a preparedness plan that includes isolating an infected person as much as the home permits for as long as they are suspected to have COVID-19, says Kumi Smith. If you’re using your computer or phone before or during sex, make sure that’s disinfected as well, she says. According to Tara Smith, having had the coronavirus doesn’t make you immune to getting it again, or to unknowingly spreading it to others. While most people do seem to develop an antibody response that helps fight off future infection, Tara Smith says that this isn’t true for all cases, and scientists still can’t pinpoint exactly how long this antibody response lasts. A study published in January 2021 in the journal Science found that people can have antibodies up to eight months after recovering from the coronavirus. However, previous studies, such as one published in July 2020 in Science Daily, have suggested that timeframe is much shorter, and that antibodies fall dramatically after three months. “We’ve seen a number of reinfections in people who have already experienced COVID-19, and we don’t know much at all about their ability to spread the virus if reinfected, but it’s likely they can,” says Tara Smith. “The general advice is to act like you’ve never been infected because there’s still a lot of information that we lack.” People who have had the vaccine also need to keep wearing a mask and following physical distance guidelines since it’s still unknown if vaccinated people can still carry and spread the virus, the CDC warns. We’re also far from reaching 240 million vaccinated Americans, which would provide herd immunity, so plan to keep following coronavirus safety measures through 2021. RELATED: How to Stop the COVID-19 Pandemic: Inside the Vaccine Clinical Trials
Connecting From a Distance — What if You Live Apart?
If you’re in the throes of a safe and healthy budding relationship, is it okay to be intimate with your new partner if you aren’t living together? The short answer is no, since guidelines from the CDC specify that you shouldn’t be getting closer than six feet to anyone who isn’t in your household. But that doesn’t mean you can’t still build a relationship while being responsible. “Relationships aren’t solely physical or sexual, and even in a new relationship, there is an opportunity to build on developing trust, intimacy, and authenticity using digital technology,” says Logan Levkoff, PhD, an American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists–certified sexuality educator. Dr. Levkoff recommends that distanced couples watch a movie, eat dinner, or even exercise together through video calls. “Many relationships are regularly long distance, and in those situations, people don’t have physical access to their partner. It’s time to apply some of those dating techniques,” she says. Your sex life can go virtual, too; just make sure that you trust that it will stay between you and your partners. “Send photos discretely or engage in dirty talk — these are great places for erotic play. There’s also mutual masturbation. If you are apart, you can still stimulate at the same time either [by] video or on the phone,” says Chavez RELATED: Sexual Health Resources
You Are Your Own Safest Sex Partner
Especially for people isolating without a partner, this is a great time to explore self-stimulation and gain a better understanding of what your body likes, Chavez says. “If you’ve never used a device before, now is a great time to try one,” says Chavez, who says to think of vibrators for masturbation as you would gym equipment for your workout.
Vibrators, Sex Toys, and More Useful Tools
“Vibrators add so much variation,” she says. In fact, sex toy sales, especially vibrators, skyrocketed during stay-at-home orders, according to a report published in April 2020 in AdWeek. Make sure you wash and disinfect any toys or electronics that you use during your session. Not only can COVID-19 live on surfaces for hours or even days, you also run the risk of spreading bacteria and fungi to your intimate parts. Flowers also recommends taking this time to brush up on fertility and sex education, especially since less than half of the states in the United States require sex education in schools, according to Planned Parenthood. Flowers recommends Afrosexology, Sex Positive Families, and Dr. Lexx the Sex Doc for people seeking credible online resources for sex education or reeducation. RELATED: 12 Sex-Positive Wellness Gifts
STDs and Pregnancy During the COVID-19 Pandemic
Although some data has shown that the number of sexually transmitted diseases being diagnosed dipped during stay-at-home orders, Flowers suspects this is due to fewer people getting tested due to restricted access to in-person healthcare, rather than a significantly smaller number of people actually contracting STDs. A survey published in October 2020 by the National Coalition of STD Directors found that 80 percent of sexual health screening clinics had to either reduce their hours or remain closed for an extended amount of time during the pandemic. The survey also highlights the innovation of telehealth during the pandemic and at home self-collection testing as an alternative to in-person STD testing. “We know that STDs were on the rise before the pandemic,” says Flowers, noting that even during strict lockdown, patients can still get screened in-person for STDs at Planned Parenthood and should contact their local healthcare provider if they would like to be tested. RELATED: Why You Shouldn’t Miss Your Ob-Gyn Wellness Visit Because of the Pandemic
Emergency Contraception and Treatment Availability
What do closed clinics mean for access to emergency contraception? People who are having sex may also want to be aware of how access to abortion may have changed in their state. In July, a judge in Maryland lifted the requirements during the pandemic, allowing doctors to prescribe abortion medication via telehealth without seeing patients in person. But on January 11, 2021, the U.S. Supreme Court reversed a ruling that temporarily legalized mail-order and telemedicine abortions during the pandemic, requiring women to be seen in-person to receive abortion medication. During normal times, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) requires women to receive medication used for abortion in person at a doctor’s office, but this regulation was temporarily reversed in July. However, the new administration has plans to reverse many of the current access barriers, including cost, related to abortion. So, these regulations may change again during the pandemic. If you find yourself pregnant during the pandemic, do not delay getting prenatal care. Getting prenatal care early on is crucial for the baby’s health and decreases your risk of a preterm birth, according to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
Domestic and Sexual Abuse Resources During the COVID-19 Pandemic
The same rules as before concerning consent and abuse apply to sex during quarantine. Forcing someone to perform a sexual act is never permissible and is abuse, just as physical and emotional abuse are. “Any relationship that is abusive is dangerous and unhealthy but particularly in these times, when people may have to self-isolate with their abusive partner,” says Levkoff. According to Levkoff, domestic violence hotlines are seeing a significant rise in calls, and while shelters and resources are available, COVID-19 has made already complicated physical and emotional safety plans more challenging. Safe Horizon, the largest victim services nonprofit organization in the United States, is offering self-quarantine options in their shelters for people who have COVID-19 symptoms and who have to or choose to leave their homes. Advocates at the National Domestic Violence Hotline are available 24 hours a day at 800-799-7233. You can also get help through the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network at 800-656-4673.
